Big Brother Mario Isn't Really Called Mario

Funny story written by Monkey Woods

Saturday, 12 July 2008

image for Big Brother Mario Isn't Really Called Mario
"No, don't drink that Sulphuric Acid, Mikey lad!"

Big Brother viewers last night voted to evict one of the show's most boring contestants ever, in the form of hunky Mario Marconi, the 43-year-old former stripping policeman from Warrington in Cheshire.

Mario, real name 'Sean', yes, that's right, Sean, received 77% of the public vote, allowing fat-legged and saggy-titted Rebecca a one-week reprieve before she, too, surely, disappears back into Oblivion.

Sean, (let's call him Sean, shall we?), bored viewers and annoyed fellow housemates with his constant authoritarian attitude and references to Health & Safety Laws, as he strove to garner support from Blind Mikey, for whom everything is a potential danger.

Marconi, as well as not being called 'Mario', has no other connection to Italy, and is probably not even called 'Marconi' either. He does look rather like Sylvester Stallone, however, and his favourite film is Rocky.

Might as well have called himself Rocky Balboa then, not Marco Marconi. Daft twat.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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