Exclusive: Lyrics to New Michael Jackson Song Discovered

Funny story written by dalepetrie

Tuesday, 11 May 2004


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I'm not that innocent

When New Jersey prosecutors seized a pair of Michael Jackson's underpants, along with some handwritten notes from Henry Vaccaro Sr.'s warehouse several weeks ago, no one realized at the time that they had confiscated unpublished song lyrics to an as yet untitled song apparently penned by Jackson just a few months ago. The song addresses the King of Pop's unusual behavior in a frank and unsettling manner. We at the Spoof have obtained exclusive access to these song lyrics, which one can hope will surface on Jackson's next studio album, tentatively titled "The Pedophile", which is scheduled to be released in June of 2005.

Untitled Michael Jackson Song

You gotta uh

So I like to have sex with little boys
I lure them to Neverland with fancy toys
That one kid had cancer, he'll die anyday
Just ain't no way they're gonna put me away.

Hee hee

I got bored with my chimpanzee
Sex with him just didn't do it for me
I tried to have sex with Lisa Marie
But I'm Whacko Jacko, and that just ain't me.

All right
Hee hee


Gonna buy me a white boy
Gonna dangle him high
Gonna wait till he's seven
And make his ass mine
Gonna name him umbrella
Gonna wrap him in lace
Gonna put him through hella
And jizz on his face

Hee Hee
Hee Hee

I've had hundreds of surgeons work on my nose
My skin is transparent and so white glows
I can't go outside in the rain or I'll melt
But that's fine cuz I got some new boys to be felt

Chorus x2

All Right
Hee Hee

I'm a freak of nature to the highest degree
And all of my fans think I'm nice as can be
But they're all morons, they don't even care
If I have a roomful of naked boys brushing my hair

Hee Hee
You Gotta Uh


Jackson could not be reached for comment as he was too busy trying to trying to trade his daughter Paris to another parent for their son.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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