Another Lohan Destined for Destruction

Funny story written by Tiki Murphy

Wednesday, 5 March 2008

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Don't let this happen to Ali.

In entertainment news, the Lohan family is now going to be doing a reality show. This show is going to be based on Dina's mismanagement of Ali's career. Young Ali is wanting to follow in her big sisters footsteps, or perhaps Mrs. Lohan wants a second shot at fame.

"Dina Lohan, or any parent for that matter, should not be managing their children," says one Hollywood insider. "Especially, if that parent is living through their child's experiences. It's not healthy. As much as we all love Drew Barrymore, with the way Dina 'manages', Ali could very well end up like Drew when she was that age."

This new turn of events have parents in an uproar. "She has already destroyed one of her daughters. I mean, come on, even if half of what was printed was wrong...," says one mother of three. "I mean at least Britney's meltdowns weren't done with her mom so closely on deck."

The main concern around Hollywood now, is whether Dina will keep a tighter hold on Ali, or if she will use her daughter's fame like she used Lindsay.

"Lindsay and Ali both would be a lot better off (I can't believe I am saying this), if they had a true agent/manager. Sure, they would lose 15% of their earnings, but a good agent would keep them in line. I wouldn't have such a problem if Dina actually knew how to be a manager. However, she just knows how to be a diva and party girl. That's not something her daughters need right now. They need someone who will guide them through the mire that is Hollywood and fame," says a concerned Hollywood professional.

Dr. Phil says, "The main concern I have is that when it comes to the fame, money, parties and recognition, Dina is just as much influenced as her daughters. She is not necessarily a bad mother, but she does need to learn when to be manager and when to be mom."

Many of the industries people are concerned that Dina will let her daughter's success go to her head. She has been known to pull the diva attitude. Only time will tell. There are high hopes that she's learned from her mistakes with Linday, and that she will correct them with Ali. However, several experts are saying that she is already ruining Ali's chances.

"There is no cause to do a reality show at this stage. Not before Ali has a chance to succeed. Dina doing one is understandable. She is a nobody, who isn't even a has-been, who happens to have a famous daughter. But to crush poor Ali's career before it even starts? Now we know she isn't a manager, but a fame grabber. Everyone knows that reality shows are for the people who have nowhere else to go. Chris Knight, Whitney and Bobby, Britney and Kevin, the Surreal Life. I mean please. Dina has already signed Ali's "Hollywood death warrant" with this. You can tell that this isn't for Ali, this is for her. For that, there is no punishment," says Mr. Lohan, when asked what he thought of what Dina was doing to daughter number two.

All this writer can say, is that I wish Ali the best, I want the old Lindsay back, and fire your mother. Don't let her drag you down, they way she did Lindsay. Get a real manager, and let your talent flow.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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