Male Stars, Taking Cue From Britney, Shed Underwear

Funny story written by Billy Bloom

Wednesday, 24 October 2007

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Frustrated by all the attention today's starlets are getting for their panty-free public adventures, an increasing number of male stars has begun making the nightclub rounds sans underwear.

"It's liberating!" said a jubilant Zach Braff. "I mean, I was down to just a thong, anyway, but this is way better! And the paparazzi trying to shoot up-pant-leg shots don't bother me in the least."

Not everyone was thrilled, however. Tess Teacle, president of the Board Against Lad's Lumps (B.A.L.L.), was horrified by the new trend. "This is an appalling fad," she declared. "Who wants to see those things flopping around? It's bad enough I have to walk past my husband every morning--and now this??"

But like it or not, it seems to be catching on fast. Jake Gyllenhaal, spotted coming out of The Rumba Room (and his pants) on Saturday night, said "Boxers…I've quit you!"

"Not fair!" screeched slut extraordinaire Lindsay Lohan. "We invented it! Now what the #*%!* am I supposed to do to get attention? Start going topless? Hey....."

In response to the craze, Jockey announced today that it will be coming out with Invisiballs transparent briefs in November. The shorts, whose tag line is "See what you've been missing!" are said to have all the support of a traditional brief, while still enabling the wearer to gross out anyone in sight.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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