NEW ORLEANS - (Satire News) - Members of the New Orleans Police Department Vice Squad report arresting a Nawlins fortune teller for lying worse than Trump The Lying Pervert.
A spokesperson for the NOPD explained that after getting dozens of complaints, the police vice squad moved in and arrested Madam Lulu DuDew, and after conducting a full body cavity search, they found a baseball sized crystal ball up inside her muffin.
The strikingly sexy French Creole woman did not put up a fight other than biting one of the vice squad members in his upper groin area.
Officer Julian Jistenwax (Badge #7722840] said that after DuDew bit him he took out his taser and tased her ass and then for good measure he pepper sprayed the crazy Creole's cunt region.
SIDENOTE: Miss DuDew's $14,705 bail was reportedly paid by a rich member of the Louisiana Chapter of The Belligerent Bougainvillea Ku Klux Klan.
