Written by politicalpop

Monday, 15 January 2007

image for New Rocky Film to Create OAP ASBO Surge
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LONDON - The Home Office is expecting a big increase in the number of older people resorting to violence and anti-social behaviour following the release of the latest Rocky Balboa film this weekend.

Experts are predicting that the new movie, which shows a 100 year old Rocky coming out of retirement once again, will encourage hundreds of retired people to get into trouble with the law. ASBOs have already been handed to over 30,000 people aged over 80 years. Many are as old as 100-years old.

Home Office spokesman Dominic Breech: "This film shows that, just because you're old, it doesn't mean you're on the ropes. Ha ha. We may not need old fighters but the met is always on the look out for great boxers, first class assistants who will help us in the fight against crime. We value older people for their experience, reliability and willingness to have a go, and just like Rocky, we don't have a retirement age. You don't have to throw in the towel just because you're too old to join the met. Geddit."

The film, starring ageing actor Sylvester Stallone, playing a 160-year-old Rocky, goes on release this weekend.

Said the Home Office's Dominic Breech: "Sly has reached the age where we'll be happy to give him a job on the beat. And he can even bring his mum, 190 year-old Mrs. Stallone, too."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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