Pop icon Britney Spears will be featured on the cover of the February National Geographic. The singer is to be shown in her natural environment, doing the things that most single mothers do. The story is expected to include shots of Britney arriving at parties (the cover shot will show her exiting a car), breastfeeding her children (a National Geographic staple), and trying on new clothing (park of the daily life of the California shop-a-holic).
Said editor Rowan Atlas, "We like to feature wildlife in its native habitat. Over the past several years, our publication has gotten the reputation for often showing naked black African tribesmen on the savannah. We wish to show some equal time, so our February issue will be the beginning of that."
"In subsequent months, we will feature native Brazilians on the nude beaches of Rio de Janiero, naked Europeans on the French Riviera, an in depth study of the art and history of the pole dance, an inside look at the Playboy empire, a review of current practices in breast augmentation surgery (this will be a two month article, showing both before and after photos), and a look at the mating habits of the 5'6", blonde, 105 pound, Swedish bikini model."
Sales of the magazine are expected to break distribution records.
In a related story, junior high schools across the country have announced a record number of requests from students to check out upcoming editions of the National Geographic magazine to assist with homework assignments.