Written by Noshing Mink

Tuesday, 24 November 2015

image for Actor Charlie Sheen filmed playing the male trombone
Charlie Sheen waitin' to give some!

Former Two and a Half Men star Charlie Sheen has been seen in a new film slurping the gerkin. The grainy footage shows the once handsome celebrity getting his knees dirty and smoking some pole.

Sheen, 50, lost his role as hard-drinking, womanizing Charlie Harper in the popular CBS show following a rant with the makers of the programme, and his character was quickly killed off. An anonymous scriptwriter said:

"Ironically, while Charlie Harper was lying on his back in a wooden coffin, Charlie Sheen was lying on his knees coughin' up someone else's wood"

Charlie, or Billy Joe, as he is known in Los Angeles' acting community, lives in a $20 million home and has a reputation for sleeping with lots of women, including prostitutes. He has even reportedly been the subject of extortion after he discovered he was HIV positive. But this is the first live footage of him smokin' a sausage.

Walker Crisps announced that they will be renaming their smoky bacon flavour "Charlie Sheen", in his honour, and will run a lottery where some packs will contain a special blackmail note which can be cashed in for $5 million!

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: charlie sheen




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