BBC Three Controller Zai Bennett "Broken"

Funny story written by Jack Allen

Saturday, 21 June 2014

image for BBC Three Controller Zai Bennett "Broken"
An artists impression of Zai

BBC Three's controller Zai Bennett could be replaced as early as next week as insiders are saying that he is yet to fully mentally recover after watching a full episode of Sweat The Small Stuff.

Since watching the episode Mr Bennett has given the go ahead for Badults, another season of Bad Education, and a whole host of other patience-murdering gash no sane person would watch of their own accord.

John Stayman, a former friend of Mr Bennett, said in an interview today "I used to call Zai a close friend. BBC 3's tagline is 'never afraid to try new things' but when he told me that he'd given the ok for another programme hosted by Greg James and Russell Kane, I just f*****g lost it".

The BBC are reluctant to publicly back Zai Bennett, however a new working stipulation has been introduced for its staff due to this latest incident. It is now mandatory for all programme commissioners not to watch any of the programmes they personally give the green light. This is to ensure they do not suddenly have the overwhelming desire to Whitney Houston themselves.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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