Boston Celtics To Make Trade with Vatican

Funny story written by Ossurworld

Friday, 15 February 2013

With Pope Benedict's edict that he will retire soon, superstar Kevin Garnett dropped a net on the ever-speculating press about his own retirement, but this threat may be a ploy to accept a trade from the green C's to the Holy See team.

Could it be that Celtics general manager Danny Ainge will trade Garnett to the Vatican for a center Cardinal and two monsignors?

Who said the Celtics don't have a prayer to make the playoffs?

The Pope has put on many minutes playing hard during the past few seasons, and the Holy See could do with a younger pontiff at center.

Mileage may be weighing on Garnett as well, but he could take on the mantle and miter of a pontiff for a contender and take the Vatican City team to the big day before the asteroid hits.

Boston fans might not be too thrilled to see Cardinal Bernard Law return to the pulpit as the big man, but a couple of monsignors might handle the ball in the absence of Rajon Rondo and Leandro Barbosa.

The Holy See may think a trade with Boston would put them on the frontier of sports shenanigans where Emperor Belichick has worn the number of the beast for a decade.

The mad escapades of party-monster Gronk have tempted fans to follow in his wayward path. The Vatican deal could bring a moral compass back to Boston.

In the meantime Kevin Garnett has told the press he will be attending his last all-star game before riding to glory in a Popemobile, wearing #1.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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