Greek Orthodox Church Shock Frontrunner to Sign Pope Benedict

Funny story written by Dontquotemenews

Tuesday, 12 February 2013

The Greek Orthodox Church has made a dramatic, multi-million dollar bid for the signature of Pope Benedict XVI. A number of leading religions are competing for the former pontiff's services after he handed in a transfer request to the Vatican.

"With the former Pope on our team we feel that we can climb up the standings very quickly," said Archbishop Costas Poulikos, Manager of the Greek Orthodox Church. The Church has been struggling near the bottom of the attendance league for years.

But the transfer is far from a done deal. The Church of Latter Day Saints in the US is preparing a bid for Benedict, and has deep pockets. Protestants are keen to acquire the key player from their rival religion too, and are planning to make an offer. An outlier in the frame is the American Southern Baptists, who have less money but will give Benedict very generous shirt revenue terms.

The Greek Orthodox Church is favourite to capture the former Pontiff, however, since he wants to stay in Europe and is unlikely to sign for the Protestants.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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