Lady Gaga cancels Perth Concert after his balls drop

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Friday, 6 July 2012


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"Yes, exactly, bollocks"

Lady Gaga has cancelled a concert in Australia, part of his Born This Way Ball Tour, after his balls dropped and his voice broke late last night, according to the stars publicist.

The star was due to perform at Burswood Dome on Saturday and Sunday nights.

The news of the cancellation of his concert is a big disappointed to his fans, many of whom were camped outside his hotel.

In a controlled appearance lasting just a couple of minutes, Gaga was ushered through the lobby of the Crown Metropol Perth by his security detail shortly after the announcement. He signed just a handful of autographs and gruffly told reporters that he did not consider that his career was over but would be reinventing himself in light of his current predicament.

The 26-year-old singer, who has famously worn dresses made of meat, while always denying the presence of man meat under these dresses has been long rumoured to have been born a man, joining many other famous "hermaphrodites" such as Jamie Lee Curtis, Margaret Thatcher and Mark Owen from Take That.

Gaga once stated, after a video was released clearly showing the singer possessed a penis: "It's not something that I'm ashamed of, just isn't something that I go around telling everyone. Yes. I have both male and female genitalia, but I consider myself a female. It's just a little bit of a penis, very small, like Tom Cruises and really doesn't interfere much with my life, a bit like Tom Cruises."

Lady Gaga's management are discussing refunds for her disappointed Australian fans but claim he will be back recording, albeit sporting a beard and singing baritone, sometime next year.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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