Kelly Clarkson Is Tired of Kelly Osbourne's Trash Talk

Written by Abel Rodriguez

Sunday, 27 November 2011

image for Kelly Clarkson Is Tired of Kelly Osbourne's Trash Talk
Kelly Clarkson says that she has recently cut back from five to three Big Macs per day. (Photo courtesy of Charles Barkley).

HOLLYWOOD - Kelly Clarkson recently appeared on X-Factor where she sang her hit song "Stronger."

After the show she spoke backstage with Vodka Vermicelli of iRumors. Miss V asked Kelly how she was feeling after recently having had a little female procedure done.

Clarkson replied that she felt fine and that her pap smear was perfect except for the fact that it did show that her trans fat intake was a little high.

VV asked Kelly if she was at all upset about the remarks that Kelly Osbourne had made about her during her recent appearance on The View.

Clarkson said that she had not seen the show and asked what exactly Osbourne had said about her.

Vermicelli said that Kell-O, as Kelly Osbourne is known, told Elisabeth Hasselbeck that Clarkson has gained so much weight that her love handles now have love handles.

She also said that Clarkson is a compulsive-aggressive eater who becomes very angry if she does not eat at least once an hour.

Kelly Clarkson told Vermicelli that Osbourne is one to talk since the word on the streets of Beverly Hills is that Kell-O salts her food with Tostitos Corn Chips.

Clarkson went on to say that with all of her tattoos that "Little O" as her mother Sharon Osbourne calls her, looks like she could be related to Miss American Tattoo herself Kat Von D.

K-Clar added that Osbourne's problem is that she has been hanging around Joan Rivers way to much and she is even starting to get that freaky looking space alien look that Rivers has developed due to her dozens of botox sessions.

Kelly Clarkson says that she will simply ignore Kelly Osbourne who is just mad because she was recently caught self-tickling her crotch region in the parking lot of a Burger Bandit in Tarzana.

Vodka Vermicelli and iRumors will stay with the story and provide any trash talk that may come from either of the two Kelly's; Kelly Clarkson or Kelly Osbourne.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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