Federal Ice Cream Company to Declare Bankruptcy

Funny story written by Philbert of Macadamia

Thursday, 21 October 2010

image for Federal Ice Cream Company to Declare Bankruptcy
Plain Vanilla and Chocolate

Washington DC: The Federal Ice Cream Company, NYSE symbol USA, may be declaring bankruptcy. USA was established 234 years ago as a limited partnership, which grew from 13 stores to 50 stores.

The founders of USA produced a plain vanilla product, leaving the various stores to take care of embellishing the plain vanilla product described in their original Constitution. The founders were very frugal men, who knew the value of the US dollar. They were not enamored by having outstanding debt.

Over the years through various recessions and panics, USA survived and prospered sticking with the founders original chartering Constitution to sell a plain vanilla product. Some amendments were added now and then to accommodate changing times.

During one very severe depression the USA product line was upgraded to include chocolate and tuti fruti. Plain vanilla and chocolate products survived during subsequent crisis's with the value of the US dollar still being sound and any incurred debt being repaid.

Then new management took over USA, who were out of touch with the 50 stores and expanded the product line from plain vanilla and chocolate to over 40 new flavors. The 50 stores could not sell the new product lines, which USA management had financed by borrowing money from China and incurring a huge debt. The US dollar is not sound anymore.

The stockholders in USA are to select a new management team in the very near future, which will determine if bankruptcy can be averted and the US dollar made sound again!

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more