Written by Pointer

Friday, 10 April 2009

image for Chinese Giant ILOVETOFU Denied Stock Market Listing
Masturbating Monkey said: " ILOVETOFME!"

ILOVETOFU has been making offering its exciting and silky smooth product for decades on the Asian market. Its stock has held firm and provided great big delightful dividends to all its holders. No seemed able to resist ILOVETOFU that is until the giant tried to list on the NY Stock market. Market mavens denied the company a spot on the its big board without explanation.

Market watchers were confounded. They remarked across the board that the NY Stock Exchange has every crook, liar, bigot and bugger as esteemed members. Why ILOVETOFU should not have its place outraged business writers and pundits.

A former NYS governor was the only observer to seem to get it:" What are you kidding me?! When these NYS puritans found out that ILOVETOFU they nearly crucified me. If they did it to little ole Jewish me, then they're not goin to stop for some Asian fuckers!"

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: Stock Market




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