Written by Jaggedone

Tuesday, 1 May 2018

image for UK Estate Agents post porno pictures on walls of their 'For Sale' houses!
Who needs flowered wallpaper on the wall when you can have this instead!?

The housing market in the UK is generally regarded as 'totally BONKERS,' and now Estate Agents are 'bonking' up the hype even further by allowing porno pictures hanging on the walls of their houses to be part of the sales pitch!

The idea came from a total 'tosser' who flogged his house on E Bay without an Estate Agent, and forgot to remove the images of naked birds in naughty positions 'bonking!' The response was unbelievable as punters on viewing trips to the house demanded to see the guy's bedroom! He obliged, and instead of looking at the garden, the fitted kitchen, or boring living room, potential buyers, male and female, swooped into his bedroom for a quick viewing. The house was sold within five minutes and, the buyers demanded the bedroom to remain as it was in the picture on E Bay!

Estate Agents, better known as hyenas, have now started pitching with porno in a hope to increase the insane prices of houses all over the UK, and of course, their commissions!

The usual sales pitch, "Location, Location, Location!" has now been replaced by "Fornication, Fornication, Fornication!" to adapt to modern day lifestyles of young potential buyers who don't give a crap about marriage vows!

In addition, the original meaning of a 'hard sell' has now been put into a completely different context, especially after punters have viewed bedrooms with 'hardcore' porno images hanging on the walls, instead of flowered wallpaper!!

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: porno, estate agents




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