Follow-Up: Apple Sues McDonalds

Funny story written by lukesams6

Monday, 31 October 2011

image for Follow-Up: Apple Sues McDonalds
Apple and McDonalds go head to head over MkLinux and McLinux.

CUPERTINO, CA. - Apple, Inc. announced today that it has filed a lawsuit against McDonalds, claiming that the new McLinux 1.0 distribution is too similar to the Apple sponsored MkLinux project.

"MkLinux is all about lean-Microkernel design. But now with the advent of McLinux, people are going to unfairly associate oozing fat, grease, and cholesterol with MkLinux. The X in the MkLinux logo may look like a ketchup stain, but that's where the similarity ends," Tim Cook, Apple's still-interim-CEO, said at a press conference. "Health conscious vegetarians who have long been Apple's best customers could possibly shun MkLinux, and by extension, Apple. We absolutely cannot stand by and let this happen."

In conjunction with the lawsuit, Apple is launching a mini-ad campaign that stresses the differences between MkLinux and McLinux. "There's no need to have your MkLinux distribution 'Super Sized'," the ad copy proclaims. "And you can run MkLinux on 'Little Macs', too."

In response, McDonalds has filed a counter-suit, arguing that Apple's corporate logo is too similar to an ingredient in McDonald's apple pies. An anonymous McDonalds spokesman said, "Our customers may go into an Apple retailer and see a machine that they think is a fresh McDonalds pie. Certainly the iMac is priced like one. But when they bite into it, they will surely be disappointed." When asked about the MkLinux logo, he responded, "We sent the MkLinux logo off to an FBI lab to be chemically identified. If it is found to be ketchup, we will be forced to file a second counter-suit."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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