Steve Jobs speaks through SIRI

Written by Knackle

Saturday, 22 October 2011

CUPERTINO, CA-New England native and longtime iPhone owner Jeorge Ballad Cole claims that Steve Jobs spoke to him through SIRI.

In familiarizing himself with SIRI, Jeorge decided to ask "Where is Steve Jobs?" SIRI replied "I don't see 'Steve Jobs' in your contacts."

With that, Jeorge went on to figure out how to set appointments and text messages. Later that night, Jeorge woke from a restless slumber and decided to chat with SIRI. After asking what she was wearing, he again asked "Where is Steve Jobs?" and to his frightful surprise, SIRI replied in Steve's voice: "You are asking the wrong question."

Now wide awake and tripped the f*** out, Jeorge asked again and got the regular SIRI response back.

He immediately called Steve Job's confidant Walter Isaacson to report the issue. It was then that Walter revealed to Jeorge that Steve's voice and vision was built into SIRI.

"Steve was far beyond his time and had insights and knowledge beyond current acceptance." said Isaacson. Steve has put forth a global challenge to "ask the right questions."

Steve believes the world is not yet ready to receive his visions and they will not be revealed until he and SIRI are convinced the world's collective conscious is prepared to understand the next revelation in a series of upcoming events and world changing breakthroughs that will guide humanity for generations to come.

Isaacson also revealed that there are clues cryptographically weaved into the text and symbolism of the upcoming authorized biography entitled "Steve Jobs".

With over 3,000,000 pre-release sales scheduled for an October 24th release, this 656 page masterpiece proves to be as mysterious as the man himself.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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