Physicist Breaks the Law of Conservation of Mass with Socks
Ed, a physicist at Johns Hopkins University Applied Physics Laboratory, says he's found the next ground breaking theory in physics. He claims he has found evidence disproving the law of conservation of mass with socks. The law of conservation of mass...
Read full storyTrump Reports 50% Drop in Murder Rate Since Taking Office
Washington D.C., June 25, 2017- Since taking office in January, the Trump Administration has succeeded in reducing the murder rate by half. The murder rate, as reported by Trump himself in a meeting with Sheriffs from across the U.S. back in Febru...
Read full storyPresident Trump Trashes Oval Office
White House sources have confirmed that President Trump has caused considerable damage to the Oval Office. 'He turned over tables,' reported one source, 'upended chairs, ripped curtaining and threw paintings out of smashed windows onto the White H...
Read full storyBowling Green Massacre Victims Honored After 370 Years
Today distant descendants of the Lenape Indian tribe gathered in Bowling Green to pay respects to their ancestors from 1643. Also attending were some distant Dutch descendants whose great, great, great, great cousins and grandparents might have helpe...
Read full storySessions hunts "Swamp Thing"
Washington DC - Senator Sessions got out his guitar, got together with his boys in the garage to celebrate his confirmation with a brand new set of Lyrics for "Wild Thing", reproduced below. He and the boys cranked it up so loud the swamp things got all agitated like. Swamp thing, you make my pigeon sing You make everything a felony, swamp thing Swamp , I think I hate you But I wanna kno...
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