Mary Berry Will No Longer Be Talking About Irregular Shaped Balls on the Great British Bake Off
London The Great British Bake Off's 82-year old Mary Berry is leaving the show. Fans are disappointed that listening to Ms. Berry talk about balls and sausages will no longer be an option. "I learned so many things from Mary" spoke one of her man...
Read full storyUKIP politician denies punching colleague
The UKIP MEP involved in an altercation with Steven Woolfe has said he "categorically did not" throw a punch at his colleague as if had,"he would have knocked him out!" Mike Hookem acknowledged he and his colleague had a "scuffle" in the European...
Read full storyLatest Survey Shows Both Trump and Hillary Losing to Independent Candidates
Washington, DC According to the latest polls for the U.S. 2016 Presidential Election, Republican and Democratic candidates Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton had canceled each other out and now nobody wants them for President. Spoke a supporter: "Af...
Read full storyBrad and Angelina's Children Sue to Be Put in An Orphanage
Los Angeles, CA The children of Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie have filed suit for emancipation or, at the very least, the right to live in an orphanage or foster home. "We just have to get away. We are so tired of getting our pictures taken and the...
Read full storyMiss Piggy sues Trump for defamation and claims he was a frog until she kissed him and became a prince
Muppet character and movie star, Miss Piggy Jamon, will soon file a $380M lawsuit against U.S. Presidential candidate, real estate developer and reality television personality, Donald J. Trump. Amiko Aventurista reports that Missy Piggy has three ba...
Read full storyKim Kardashian Will Sue City of Paris After Robbery
Los Angeles, CA After her TV show was put on hold following her harrowing robbery in Paris where she was tied up and robbed, Kim Kardashian began a new crusade. "This incident really put the 'bare ass' in embarrassment" ranted Kim. "How could anyo...
Read full storyDemocratic Fracking
Lancashire County Council have agreed that fracking should not take place in their area of jurisdiction but democracy means that the views of Lancashire County Council are irrelevant. This new concept of democracy is being promoted because it is i...
Read full storyNorth Korean Dictator Fires PR Man
Pynongyang, North Korea Kim Jong-Un, North Korean dictator REALLY knows how to put the "dic" in dictator. Reports are that Kim is very pissed at his public relations man for not getting him more press space in world newspapers. The PR man exp...
Read full storyHitler to Goebbels Letter Found
Road diggers near the site of the Reichstag building in Berlin have found what appears to be a letter from Adolf Hitler to Joseph Goebbels his Propaganda Minister dated June 1939. It reads... "Dear Joe, Thanks for the latest films and radio broadcasts. Great stuff. Especially the rallies. Nothing like heebie-jeebie spectacle... drums, flags and the darkness of night to get the German...
Read full storyCorn Flakes Box Doorstoppers: How To Make One
Here we are again with the latest in our How To Make One series, and this time it's something extremely useful, and also muchly cheap! If you've ever needed something to keep the door ajar on hot summer days, you're in luck, because my latest idea...
Read full storyMore States Request Trump's Help in Pronunciation
After Donald Trump boldly explained to a reluctant Nevada crowd that they have been pronouncing their state name wrong, multiple other states stampeded to be the next in line to get the presidential candidate's guidance. Trump explained at a campa...
Read full storyGod Enraged Chik fil A is Closed on Sunday
God woke up last Sunday with one thing on his mind: a nice hot Chik fil A chicken sandwich with a large fries and a large coke. To his dismay he soon found out all Chik fil A locations were closed on Sunday in order to give homage to the Almighty h...
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