
Woman stoned to death for adultery
Yesterday, at The Grand Mosque in Canberra, Australia, a woman was stoned to death for allegedly being caught committing adultery with an unnamed man. The woman, known to us only as Sharia, was allegedly caught in a compromising situation with the ma...
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Man Turns To Cannibalism During Traffic Snarl Up
A 33-year-old father of three has admitted to eating parts of his co-worker in what police have described as a 'justifiable act.' Steven Charlton and colleague Ken Moore found themselves stuck in traffic on a jam-packed I-95 twenty miles north of...
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Elementary schoolchildren to be forced to pay for own education under the new federal "Fuck Yo Kids" initiative
A new federal law that ensures that children will no longer mooch off taxpayer money in order obtain an education at public elementary schools will take effect in 2017. The "Fuck Yo Kids" initiative will force the majority of schoolchildren in the...
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Now You Can Release Your Inner Trump
It used to be, you had to keep it all inside. Mommy said, "Play nice or you'll get a time-out." Well, you didn't want to play nice. You wanted to punch little Jimmy in the face and call little Susie an ugly whore. But you couldn't or Mommy or Teacher or Mr Policeman would make you face the consequences of your actions. So what did you do? You played 'Grand Theft Auto' and 'Call of Duty' to subl...
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Voters Warned of Lead Pencil Poisoning as They Mark Their Primary Ballots
New York - The city's Board of Elections issued an official health alert to New Yorkers voting in the presidential primaries: "Don't touch, taste or sniff the core of the pencil with which you are marking your ballot. It is really made of lead and c...
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