
White Bread and Puppet Dancer Shot By Hunter
WHITE BREAD-VT A dancer for the White Bread and Puppet Theatre in a deer costume was accidentally shot today in the woods outside of Glover. The group, which usually rehearses in a theatre was in the woods to experiment with realism. "We wanted...
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Madonna To Market Babies
Skibo Castle, Scotland, U.K.---Reliable sources are reporting that Madonna Cicone Richie, once upon a time, many, many long years ago known as just plain old Madonna, as if there were something magical in her handling of the moniker, is planning to m...
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Winery Opens - Residents Wake Up With Hangovers
CURDLED MILK-N.C.-Just as the fog was beginning to settle in the early morning hours of this small, rural community located in the southern bible belt of the United States, residents awoke to a fog settling in over their brains.
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Files reveal Cameron is a mutated Lore re-incarnation
Whitehall, London - (Associated Mess): Files released under the 9/11 Freedom of Disinformation Act have revealed that the Pentagon ordered its UK outreach office at Tory Party HQ to insert a re-programmed Lore prototype android as the next party lead...
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Community Owned Grocery Store Looted by Owners
CARRBORRO-N.C. In the People's Republic of Carrborro today a community owned grocery store was looted when power went out on the 100th block off Weaver Street. Throngs of shareholders wearing Teva sandals and patchouli perfume rushed inside turni...
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Lindsay Lohan Naked Is Mum On Ex-Rep. Foley's Addiction to Phonics
Former Rep. Mark Foley yesterday added "Hooked on Phonics" to his list of admitted addictions, along with Hostess Twinkies, Ding Dongs, Big Hunks, and reruns of the TV sitcom "Different Strokes."...
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George Bush Invites Americans to the White House to be Tortured
WASHINGTON (AP) -- President Bush said Friday the United States "certainly does" torture innocent prisoners and even average citizens as he tried to calm the growing controversy after Vice President Dick Cheney said drowning (known as water...
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Reporter Finds Bob Dylan Really Likes Golf
HILTON HEAD ISLAND-S.C. Put your doubts aside. Folk singer Bob Dylan has admitted that he really likes to play golf. "There is nothing like a round of golf to release tension before a show," the 65-year old musician said. "I wish the r...
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