Britney Spears Gives Second Recorded Virgin Birth
(AP) Entertainer and virgin Britney Spears gave birth to a bouncing baby boy. A spokesman for the singer gave this statement: "The baby was born through normal means. While he did come into the world naked, it was done tastefully and was not sexua...
Read full storyUS No Longer "Under God" According to San Francisco Court
San Francisco -- In a controversial ruling in San Francisco's 9th District Court Judge Larry Karlton declared today that America is no longer a nation "Under God." In his ruling, Karlton remarked that "American citizens are now...
Read full storyLow Pants Boy
The following emergency session of The Global Archeological Society will take place on January 22nd, 12005, in Bern, Switzerland, and will do so immediately upon the heels of the landmark discovery of ten-thousand year-old Low Pants Boy’s remains. “I would like to begin this session,” says archeologist Wolf Gerhardt, leader of the archeological team that discovered Low Pants Boy,...
Read full storyThe Fictional Truth about Prince Charles, Mrs. Camilla Parker Bowles and Mrs. Caroline K Schlossberg
"Prince Charles and I live in separate worlds, divided by an unbridgeable gulf," she said. "He is a wild glamorous Prince from Cosmopolitan London, and I am a university graduate from the mountains with a no-paying job and average looks. It would nev...
Read full storyDelta to put Pilots in new Economy Class Cockpit
Atlanta - Bled by rising fuel prices, slapped by the loss of a major hub (New Orleans) and stung in the pocketbook by no-frills airlines like Southwest, Delta Airlines today announced new "Economy Class Cockpits" its pilots would be forced...
Read full storyElectrician Overcharges Letterman, gets Electric Chair
Choteau Idaho - An electrician who miswired kitchen and bath outlets in Tonight Show host David Letterman's sprawling Choteau estate has been sentenced to thirty seconds in the Idaho electric chair. "Leaving the neutral lead on a ground...
Read full storyBush Twins To Enlist in The Salvation Army
Tired of criticism from war protestor/d-list celebutante Cindy Sheehan for not joining the military, the Bush twins, Jenna and Barbara, have decided to "enlist" in the Salvation Army.
Read full storyBush Takes Blame for Government's Sluggishness in Taking Blame
Washington, DC - President Bush announced Wednesday that he was fully prepared to accept responsibility for the federal government's foot dragging in owning up to its own apathetic lethargy in the wake of hurricane Katrina.
Read full storyGeorge Bush Takes Responsibility for Katrina Blunders and Resigns
WASHINGTON--President Bush has finally taken responsibility for federal government blundering in coping with Hurricane Katrina and the much delayed relief efforts and announced his resignation on Wednesday. He also admitted that the calamity was evid...
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