Ever since the Queen learned she may be a distant relative of Johnny Depp, the Palace is a changed place. Decorum and tradition have gone out the window. "Ahoy, it's a new day," the Queen has announced to all who will listen. The Royal...
On the eve of his 90th Birthday, HRH Prince Philip has spoken of his sadness at having to prematurely end his navy career. In 1947 he married the then Princess Elizabeth, not knowing that he would have to sacrifice his own career to focus on the supe...
As soon as she heard experts say that she and Depp may be 20th cousins, Her Majesty took immediate action. Her fashion consultants were called in and ordered to design an array of Royal eye patches. "And throw out those flowery hats," the Quee...
While Prince William and Kate Middleton were being married,millions of viewers wondered what their royal whispers meant. Now professional lip reader Tina Lannin has deciphered their words for the rest of us. Here is a transcript: 10:20--William (to brother Harry): "Quite big, isn't it? This wedding." Harry: "Uh, yes. Now let's get on with it. 10:35--William (to Kate): "You look nice."...
London - Was the kiss worth the wait? Was it sincere? Was it a Frenchie? According to most viewers it was none of the above. "It was downright pithy if ask me," said Nora Higbie in an annoyed tone, "If I couldn't muster more passion than that I mi...
LONDON - Queen Elizabeth has stated that she is thrilled that all of the planning for the Royal Wedding is finally behind her. The queen who just turned 85, and her husband Prince Philip who will turn 90, on June 10 both decided that it would be a...
London - With the wedding bells all but rung, many are wondering when Kate Middleton and Prince William will get down to brass tacks. While many think the Honeymoon Night has been completely hidden, I was there when Donald Trump today divulged he has...
In a right royal debacle, Kate Middleton messed up her marriage vows, taking the name of her would-be father-in-law Prince Phillip instead of her fiancé Prince William. The Archbishop of Canterbury, who was performing the ceremony, continued, hop...
MANCHESTER - Chicharito was having dinner at the famed French restaurant Le Loins of Joan of Arc when he was asked about the rumors that he had dumped his girlfriend, the fabulously talented Shakira. Chicharito, started coughing. He quickly put do...
LONDON - As April 29 fast approaches the final preparations for the Royal Wedding are being tended to. The security at Westminster Abbey will be the heaviest it has ever been. The Bees Knees News Agency is reporting that Scotland Yard is even brin...
LONDON - British singer, Amy Winehouse reportedly was extremely dejected and upset at the fact that she was not invited to the Royal Wedding by Queen Elizabeth. Winehouse, who is considered to be one of the ugliest women in the entire United Kingd...
LONDON - Queen Elizabeth, the ever so gracious host that she is, has informed two of her favorite people, Manchester United's Chicharito and his erotically sexy girlfriend Shakira, the Colombian singer/belly dancer, to spend the weekend of the Royal...
LONDON - Queen Elizabeth is a stickler when it comes to Royal protocol. She has instructed the official Buckingham Palace physician, Dr. Hamlet "Say Ahh" Fickleberry, 97, to physically inspect Kate Middleton for any tattoos that she may have on her b...
LONDON - Representatives for the Royal Family have announced that the only brand of beer which will be available at the Royal Wedding Reception will be the newly developed beer Kiss Me Kate. The beer was developed in honor of Kate Middleton who on...
LONDON - Queen Elizabeth will be celebrating her 85th birthday on April 21. Reports coming out of Buckingham Palace state that when Prince Philip asked his wife what she wanted for her birthday she replied for him to surprise her. At first Philip figured that he would buy her a brand new yacht, but then he realized that she had not used the one he bought for her back in 1995. He then thought...
Greek xenophobe Phil "Duke of Edinburgh" Windsor has been caught trying on Kate Middleton's wedding dress by a maid at Windsor Castle. Tillie Mint entered the private chambers of the Queen and Prince yesterday to find Prince Philip parading around...
LONDON - Queen Elizabeth II has informed the media that she has booked one of the greatest rock and roll bands off all time, The Rolling Stones to perform at her grandson William and her future granddaughter-in-law Kate's wedding reception. Accord...
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