Humanity's fate was sealed earlier today when a vial containing the genetically engineered super virus known as "EbolaThrax" was dropped at a secure lab facility deep within the Pentagon. Multiple contributing factors are apparently to blame for the...
The overzealous littering team at Trafford Council have issued a fixed penalty notice to the Refuse Collection Team that covers Sale and Altrincham after one of their authorised members of staff noticed that some litter fell from the back of the lorr...
Farting, the controversial technique for obtaining the new energy source, methane gas, should be allowed nationwide, according to a recent directive from the Energy Commission. "The universally variegated act of farting, which has been blamed for...
President Obama finally came out and told the truth about ending oil lines from Canada, preventing drilling for more oil in the Gulf of Mexico and every other place that he can. "Above all, I'm an environmentalist", he told reporters today. "Look...
Reports from the environmental safety organisation, The Ecology Centre, suggest that there are high levels of toxic chemicals in jewellery taken from branches of Claire's, Forever 21, H&M and other retail outlets. Chemicals included lead, cadmium...
The first details of Government Motors two new and much awaited new-fuel automobiles have been leaked to several popular auto blogs. No photos are yet available, but this is what we know at this time. The first of the two to arrive at your local dealer will be the Chevrolet Cetacean. This is the cardinal showpiece in a long line of vehicles that GM is expected to produce which will run on wh...
A North Sea sea bream left residents of Fallshore flabbergasted yesterday as it beached itself and then held its breath for 12 whole hours while it waited for the tide to come back in. The sea bream, whose name is Jerry, stubbornly refused to acce...
Miami, FL--Everyone knows that long hair makes for better rock music, but did you know that it makes for a better planet, too? The sold-out crowd at American Airlines Arena in Miami, FL, was stunned last night when the elfin Radiohead frontman, Th...
The ConDem coalition has completed the final draft of its new environmental policy for businesses. "The aim is to save resources, energy and time," said Minister In Charge Of Environmental Review Proceedings, Richard Wadd. "Following this policy w...
A second hole in the ozone layer has been discovered, but this time its thought the cause of it is farting! "With so many foods that give us wind these days its not really a surprise. We know beans and cheese are high on the list of 'wind makers...
World leaders are to hold an urgent meeting about global warming and the top of the agenda is trees and bushes. Scientists say carrying a small tree or bush will help the world recover from the ozone and increase oxygen levels. Dr I.M. Silly said...
San Francisco, CA - Not to be outdone by top scientists in London, researchers in California are working on the next big thing in green living. They are creating 'Living' buildings that will be far greater than the 'Living' buildings that are being...
Following the shocking revelation ithis week about the expedition to find the source of the Ganges, environmental group Greenpeas has called upon the government to take action to protect the critically endangered Toilet Duck. This rare species is...
London - Legendary American body builder Charles Atlas may have been behind exaggerated stories of glacial meltdown scientists admitted today. The 'careless' tittle-tattle resulted in 15% of Greenland's coastline being deleted from global warming...
A list of the 10 safest rivers in England and Wales to take an unscheduled dump in has been released by the Environment Agency (EA). The list includes the River Wandle in London, which was officially declared a sewer in the 1960s, making it total...
Britain's many, many HGV drivers have today made a heartfelt appeal to the public to end the constant discrimination against their profession. "It's not on", said Steve Bloke, a member of pro-haulage organization, The Wagons Are The Solution, "peo...
The Green party today revealed their plan for reducing food waste. Every year in the UK thousands of tonnes of food are thrown away, which the Greens say is a shocking waste (no pun intended). Under their scheme, people will be encouraged to use e...
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