Concerns were raised today over the fragile mental state of local man, Salford born, Martin Shuttlecock. Who is said to be in a complete state of mental fugue, as tomorrow's Champions League Final between Shuttlecock's beloved Manchester United, and...
Local man, Martin Shuttlecock had given up all hope on the family's only remaining cat last week. The cat, Scrappy, daughter of the legendary Beryl, suffered a serious trauma last Tuesday, spending all night in the back garden and refusing all attempts to coax her back indoors. Early indications suggest that she had been bitten, although there were no immediately obvious injuries. At some po...
According to sources, local man, Martin Shuttlecock has announced that he is losing the will to live after being subjected to continuous abuse on what was once his favourite internet website, TheSpoof.com Long suffering wife Anne, looking grievous...
Accident prone local man, Martin Shuttlecock, world famous pillock, renowned for breaking bones (a thumb, anyway) splitting eyebrows, catching blisters, getting sacked from his job for being a stroppy bastard and having an undercarriage like two poun...
Suspected serial killer, Alfred De Bundy has contacted Skoob News International as his execution date draws ever closer, pleading his innocence and appealing for help. De Bundy, currently incarcerated in the Upstate Federal Penitentiary in downtow...
Police were called to a house in Blackguard Close, Titchfield today to investigate the killing of a pit bull terrier by an alligator in a neighbour's garden. "We received a complaint from a resident that an alligator in a neighbour's garden had ea...
It's come to light that local man and talentless occasional TheSpoof.com contributor, Martin Shuttlecock has actually set up a blog - although it appears that having gone thus far, he is utterly devoid of ideas regarding how to proceed with it. Lo...
Local man, Martin Shuttlecock, was reported to be happy again, for the first time since early on Sunday as both Liverpool AND Manchester Sh-sorry City were beaten away from home home in their respective Europa League first round ties. Observers sa...
Just in - ambulance crews inform us here at Skoob News that some woman, claiming to be Jordan got entangled in a deckchair yesterday afternoon in Clacton, Essex, after being threatened by what appeared to be a rabid goldfish. We sent intrepid repo...
Local man, Martin Shuttlecock, tonight made an impassioned plea to just be left alone as he is still smarting following his beloved Manchester United FC's trouncing by the Scouse hordes. Shuttlecock told Skoob News reporters: "Can't you just le...
Local man, Martin Shuttlecock completely lost the plot tonight as he cracked up following Liverpool's 3-1 victory over Manchester United on Sunday. Shuttlecock was distressed to learn that stories about him being distraught about the result were b...
Local man, Martin Shuttlecock was today reported to be "distraught and humiliated" this afternoon - a full 24 hours after Liverpool drubbed his beloved Man United 3-1 at Anfield. Shuttlecock has been sighted skulking around, trying to kick the cat...
Local man, Martin Shuttlecock was viciously pranked by long suffering wife, Anne on Saturday night in their Hampshire home. The Shuttlecocks had been relaxing together, spending quality time by him writing a satirical internet satire article about sock kebabs, under an alias, whilst Anne watched the James Cameron blockbuster epic 'Avatar' in HD with surroundsound. During an idle moment, havi...
As the world once again finds itself in crisis, with wholesale slaughter going on left, right and centre, there remains a beacon of hope in the stultifying pall of negativity. Fashion guru, Adolph Galileo appears to think he's got the solution.
Just in - Local man, Martin Shuttlecock, who recently with no small degree of hypocrisy, vowed not to enter his own peculiar brand of satirical nonsense on unwary internet surfers in protest at the amount of celebrity smut bollocks currently being pe...
It's just been announced that local man, Martin Shuttlecock, survived a terrifying ordeal on the morning of the 13th of January on his way to work. He hasn't made the story public until now, because it was quite traumatic, and because in his own words, he feels "a bit of a twat." The details of events leading up to the incident are quite complex, but Shuttlecock attempted to condense and presen...
Local man, Martin Shuttlecock, was quietly recovering at his Hampshire home this morning after enduring a horrific 5 hour kidnap ordeal at London Waterloo railway station yesterday afternoon. "I was terrified," the pork pie hat enthusiast declared...
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