The Pope - My Fake Diary

Tuesday, 24 March 2009

Dear Diary

Back to that trip to Africa, it was like traveling back in time and time itself seemed to matter little to most of the people there.

I peed off a witch doctor who had a whole area fooled with some tricks he had been performing that I exposed. He also got a migraine from seeing my white clothes out in the hot sun.

I finally poured holy water on him and he melted.

Couldn't use the pope mobile much because of the lack of decent roads.

I did actually get to drive it in the cities.

One day I opened the pope mobile door and there laid a cobra all coiled up. I got back out as soon as possible but I overheard one of my own group refer to it as the poop mobile later.

I feel really bad that I refused to go visit the leper colony. Through a misunderstanding, I thought they were saying leopard colony.

There were actually people called zombies there who walked around with blank looks on their faces, like those people I've seen on American TV who lost their money to Bernie Madoff.

Time for services. Gotta go for now.

Bene