Stephen Hawking - My Fake Diary

Sunday, 27 June 2010

Dear diary, I am in Canada now and just do not understand all of this fuss over me. I died years ago and for some reason the scientists are keeping my body alive. I do not know how they are doing this but they are. It is embarassing because I smell a bit and other people are keeping my dreams alive.

Dear diary, this is so unfair. I was an atheist when I lived and now in death, or as I prefer to call it, 'pre-life' I find myself in a very strange position. They have my embalmed body and have stuck it in a very wierd position in a wheelchair for all to see and worship. This is so sick.

Dear diary, I foresaw all of this when I was alive and that is why I put together this electronic diary to be 'aired' after my 'real death'.

It is blatently obvious, from my research, that I was able to figure out the Big Bang Theory. Therefore, it should be blatently obvious that I could figure out the future and leave this message for you all.

If you are interested in 'Life After Death' just go and read Lady Godiva's views on this on The Spoof.

She speaks eloquently about the Worzel Gummidge Theory, which is a theory I whole-heartedly supported, when I was alive.