Kim Jong-un - My Fake Diary

Wednesday, 3 April 2019

Dear Diary,

The real reason why the Nuclear Talks broke down in Hanoi, between "Orange-Donnie" and myself, is that he wouldn't allow me to put my cigarette out in the palm of his hand. He agreed that he would let me do it, if I agreed that I would give up my nuclear program. I told him that I could only agree to give up the program, if he allowed me to give him the cigarette-burn first. Of course, he acted like a wuss, and kept pulling his hand away! After the third time, I said, "I've had enough of your pantie-waist, bullshit!" I stormed out of the room, but just before I was out of the door, I turned around and said, "You can kiss ever getting me to give up my nuclear program, good-bye!" Trump said, "So that means you won't be taking me up on my invitation to Mar-a-lago to play golf with me?" But I digress...