Boris Johnson - My Fake Diary

Saturday, 17 July 2010

08.00 - Mrs Penelope Smythe-Withers

09.00 - Frunella Framlington-Fredwins

10.00 - Paternity test for child of Ms Matilda Pilkington-Stanley (utter balderdash - just because the little blighter has blonde hair!)

12.00 - Take push bike for service. (Thoroughly decent chap recomends getting it checked over - very important in escaping from slightly annoyed husbands)

Oh blast - paternity test is positive. Hope the new Cameron infant does not show a likeness to oneself, or one may be in for an old Etonian caning......