BILLINGSGATE POST: Earlier in this column it was announced that Sgt. Bilko was named to replace Janet Yellen as Treasury Secretary. His pledge to account for every penny in our banking system was put to the test yesterday. A widely watched video sho…
BILLINGSGATE POST: Any one who hasn’t seen Mike Lindell tout his new My Pillow 2.0 either is sleeping or comatose. With its new temperature technology, along with its My Pillow patented adjustable fill, your restless nights are over. If you bel…
BILLINGSGATE POST: Nothing - and I mean nothing - is worse news than hearing your dentist say, “Your teeth look fine, but your gums have to come out,” after viewing your X-Rays. WTF!! Hey! Maybe the next time you stuff your pie hole with sugar…
BILLINGSGATE POST: This just goes to prove, once and for all, that feminists have no sense of humor. And you don’t have to be female to be a feminist. In fact, anyone can bend their gender and be offended by just about anything. That’s why men are…
BILLINGSGATE POST: Does anyone remember when crotch-grabbing was a lost art, especially for pinch-mouth prudes with legs that didn’t meet at a common point? Incidentally, in geometric terms, this type of layout is called an “infinitesimal paralle…
BILLINGSGATE POST: Correct me if I’m right. But how can it be wrong when it feels so right? Life is full of conundrums, some more puzzling than others. Who’s to judge what is right or wrong? A better question: Who should be the final arbiter r…
BILLINGSGATE POST: Comparisons are onerous. Good vs Evil. Dark vs Light. Chicken vs Egg. Quasimodo vs Esmeralda: We could go on and on. But with the future of the free World at stake, the 2024 battle between Trump and Biden for the Presidency o…
BILLINGSGATE POST: it is undeniably a fact that Joe Biden is, at best, a useful idiot for those who call the shots in the White House. Whether he can be held culpable for his actions is disputable. He might be off the hook because he is too stupid…
BILLINGSGATE POST: In an unprecedented raid this morning, 36 armed-to-the-teeth FBI agents with Special Warfare Night Vision Goggles, snuck up on the sleeping hairpiece of Donald Trump. Backed up by a dozen or so armored vehicles, two spanking new M…
BILLINGSGATE POST: Due to the critical acclaim the previous “Ask Dr. Billingsgate” feature received, including mention of a possible Pulitzer Prize, this feature will be continued in today’s edition of the BILLINGSGATE POST. Dear Dr. Billingsgate…
BILLINGSGATE POST: During the 2022 NBA season, the average height of NBA players was 6’6”, which is 8 inches taller than the US average for males. The average height of a male Pygmy is about 5 feet. The world's shortest people are the Efe of Zaire,…
BILLINGSGATE POST: From time to time, the need for a forum to answer some of life’s intimate questions outweighs all other necessities. It also provides an opportunity for Dr. Billingsgate to utilize the profound knowledge and intellectual bonafide…
BILLINGSGATE POST: This morning, President Biden named Sergeant Ernie Bilko to replace Janet Yellon as Secretary of Treasury. When asked why Yellon was given the hook, the President smiled while speaking out of the other side of his mouth: “I wanted…
BILLINGSGATE POST: Secretariat for Mister Ed. Marilyn Monroe for Ma Kettle. Dr. Jekyll For Mr. Hyde. Princess Diana for Camilla: The list of controversial trades is endless. But this one takes the cake. On Thursday, President Biden proudly ann…
BILLINGSGATE POST: After watching President Biden getting a little too friendly with one of the turkeys he pardoned before Thanksgiving, Elmer Smuckmeister, no stranger to his own sheep, admonished Joe Biden: “Don’t do it, Joe. Those rascals will…
BILLINGSGATE POST: Yesterday, in a Senate Oversight Committee hearing, FBI Director Christopher Wray, when asked if the Hunter Biden laptop revelations were part of a Russian misinformation plot, he dismissively shrugged his shoulders, doing his bes…
BILLINGSGATE POST: It appears that Eoj Nedib and Alamak Sirrah will be throwing their turbans into the ring and run for a second term in the coming presidential election. In a previous post, it was noted that Eoj Nedib and Alamak Sirrah spelled ba…
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