by Liam Logsdon, Freelance Reporter
Los Angeles, California (AP) - A chain of costly California schools, that taught Mexican immigrants there are 53 U.S. states and five branches of the U.S. government, was ordered to stop handing out phony diplomas this week, Attorney General John Ashcroft said on Friday.
"This is without a doubt one of the largest threats to our national security I have ever seen", AG Ashcroft bellowed at reporters, who were gathered for his briefing.
"Our investigation started with the complaints coming from pilots who had graduated from their flight school". "We were receiving reports, at the rate of 20 or so a day, that our flight maps did not show all of the United States".
Authorities seized the assets of California Alternative High School and asked a judge to stop the company's 30 schools statewide from handing out diplomas.
"The majority of these students had received Federal Grants and were dreaming of a better life through education", Ashcroft said.
The company charged Latino students $450 to $1,450 a class, for a 10-week course based on a 254-page book that was riddled with errors. A lawsuit was filed on Monday.
Students learned some peculiar facts:
1.That Congress had two houses, a summer home in the New Hampshire and a winter home in Arizona.
2.They also were taught the U.S. flag had not been updated since 1950, that's was why there were only fifty stars.
3.Students were instructed that the addition of Alaska, Hawaii and Puerto Rico were still under vote.
4.That the federal ‘administrative' branch oversees the legal secretaries and paperwork.
5.That World War I occurred from 1838 to 1842, and began because an ostrich named Ferdinand was shot because he was hungry.
AG John Ashcroft went on to say, "There are 50 U.S. states, including Alaska and Hawaii, and are represented on the U.S. flag". "Puerto Rico is a U.S. controlled territory, which allows us to spy on Cuba, and is more a state of mind". "While there is an ‘administrative' branch of the U.S. government, legal secretaries are handled by the justice department".
"The five branches are administrative, judicial, executive, legislative and olive". "The olive branch is responsible for keeping peace, but has not been used for some time now". "World War I was fought between many countries, although the United States did send aid packages to feed the ostrich prior to joining".
One degree plan featured a BA in classic literature and included several pages of jokes concerning "The Traveling Salesman". Unfortunately this was not the same as Arthur Miller's classic "Death of a Salesman."
The company claimed to have 178 locations along the Mexican - US border and said it was actively expanding operations despite court orders to cease and desist. The company went on to claim the diplomas were official.
