Neanderthals Sufferred from Earworms

Funny story written by victor nicholas

Wednesday, 19 August 2009

image for Neanderthals Sufferred from Earworms
"Here Comes Peter Cottontail, Hopping Down the Bunny Trail, Hippity Hoppity Easter's on its way"

Scientists at the Max Plank Institute have theorized that primitive man may have suffered from earworms. Loosely translated from the German "Ohrwurm", an earworm is a term for a portion of a song or other musical material that repeats compulsively within one's mind, known colloquially as "music being stuck in one's head."

After years of study of Neanderthal skulls cultural paleontologist Jens Hartloper has concluded that the massive Neanderthal skull was the perfect place to hold an earworm for extended periods of time and "May have contributed to its' progressive thickening over generations of constant evolution in response to the affliction, separating it from the skull of Homo Sapiens."

Hartloper says his interest in the subject came naturally. "When I was five years the words and music of "Here Comes Peter Cottontail" was stuck in my head for six months."

"Despite vigorous treatment that included nightly mustard plasters to the scalp and vapours nothing seemed to cure the problem."

Hartloper dismisses the fact that written music was not available in prehistoric times.

Demonstrating on a large drum, he theorized the Neanderthal earworm probably sounded like this, "Bang bang bang, bang bang bang".

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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