Amstetten - (Reuterus): Military sonar equipment has detected a massive World War II Colditz-style tunnel network under Austrian incest nutter Joseph Fritzl's subterranean dungeon hellhole.
"It's shaped like the former Northern Irish H-Blocks at the Maze prison," Police Colonel Franz Polzer said today, "and connects to the town's two former wings of the Mauthausen-Gusen concentration camp."
Police remain cautious about reports that up to one hundred slaves are virtually entombed in this hellish complex.
However a convoy of large earth-moving equipment was seen in Amstetten earlier today heading for the town's sewers.
Meanwhile in London police have interviewed former Holocaust-denier and Nazi apologist David Irving who was jailed in Austria in 2006 for spreading fascist humbug.
Sources close to the UK's National Poison's Unit have reported that the Third Reich hysterian is to be DNA tested to determine if he really is the son of Hitler's deputy Rudolf Hess.
"Our information stems from claims that Fritzl may be Irving's sibling," the NPU spokesman said.
"The outcome of these tests could be crucial to current EU wrangles because we already have a direct positive match against Hess and France's President Nicholas Sarkozy."
The Duchess of Cornwall is paralytic.
