The investigation into the 'poisoning' of several congressmen and women earlier this week, has come to a standstill. The two lead suspects, pro-turd antagonists, Duncan Whitehead and Tiki Murphy, were indeed helping Mark Lowton shop for his wife. On top of that Dr. Maxwell, Mr. Whitehead, and Ms. Murphy have apparently called a tentative truce.
"We have decided to combine our efforts to find the culprit, who has besmerched the great name of TheSpoof," stated Dr. Maxwell. "I am also wanting to apologize to Mr. Whitehead and Ms. Murphy for jumping to conclusions. Besides I am nearly out ten grand from false leads."
Dr. Maxwell's sudden change of heart was explained when he was released from the Anti-Turd League. The ATL founder and president stated in a press conference this morning, "It has come to our attention that the 'esteemed' Dr. Maxwell, has actually, in fact, written a turd story himself. This will not be tolerated. He has been dismissed from the ATL, and we have taken back his coffee mug."
It seems that Dr. Maxwell's "if you can't beat them, join them" approach has brought him under suspicion as well as the rest of TheSpoof camp.
There are still no leads as to who the culprit or culprits involved are. Every law enforcement agency has been brought in to help.
Special Agent Jensen McCary says, "This is a most foul and heinous crime. We are doing everything in our power to apprehend the criminal. We are asking for anyone who knows anything, to please contact your local law enforcement immediately."
Meanwhile, the crew of TheSpoof have been told not to leave their various countries. Every writer is under suspicion, and many law enforcement officials are not convinced of Whitehead's and Murpy's innocence. There has also been a ban on any further turd stories until this has been sorted out.
As the investigation continues, so will the reporting.
