Gandhi revealed as an asshole

Funny story written by Charlie D. Nowhere

Monday, 17 March 2008

image for Gandhi revealed as an asshole
Ghandi, seen here leaving an exclusive central London lapdancing club

A press conference was held today at the National Peace Museum in New Delhi, India to announce the expulsion of Mahatma Gandhi as a member of the country's National Peace Society.
Gandhi was one of the world's most beloved leaders of nonviolence and harmony until the press conference.

He was heavily influenced by the philosophy of Brahmacharya which preaches spiritual and practical purity.

But he was best known for his role in the 1982 movie "Gandhi" where Gandhi played Gandhi.
"In papers recently discovered, it was found that on a number of occasions, particularly while petitioning for peace, Gandhi did so in a manor not becoming of a member in our society," said Madir Sulkir, curator of the museum.

Archivists found a stash of letters under the Mahatma's pillow and were shocked by what they read.
"In one passage, after listing reasons for peace on earth, Gandhi describes the slaughter of Zulus in South Africa as 'bullshit,'" said Sulkir. "It's clear to us that he was actually an asshole despite all the peace stuff."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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