Britains Worst Paedophile Released Again in Second Blunder

Funny story written by carina-eta

Friday, 18 January 2008

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Britain's most wanted paedophile, arrested yesterday In Hove, has once again been released in error by police in what is being described as the second worst blunder in police history.

29 year old Joshuah Carnivore was arrested at a seaside resort after tip-offs from 427 members of the public. He had been on the run since being released in error last year after giving false details to a gullible young officer.

A police spokesman today confirmed that Carnivore is once again on the run and poses a danger to both the public and the children of Britain. "He's even more dangerous now," quoted the officer, "not only is he a convicted paedophile but now he's angry and desparate too. Do not approach this man, even if he offers you sweets."

The blunder came about due to the completion a multi-million pound computerised police interrogation system introduced following concerns about old-fashioned police interrogation techniques. It has long been considered a less than satisfactory method of policing to interview a suspect alone in a small room with a tape recorder as this system is open to abuse.

The new system, hailed as a marvellous piece of technology last year by the Met Office, uses fingerprints, DNA, iris recognition and computerised questionnaires to conduct an investigation.

The spokesman commented,"The long and short of it is, he managed to convince the system he was a 13 year old girl named Chelsea and it let him go."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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