Written by Monkey Woods

Sunday, 3 March 2019

image for Man Feels That People Are Talking Behind His Back
A rather pretentious individual flogging a dead horse

A man who has attracted the attention of other people in connection with things he is doing, and the extent to which he is doing them, has become 'concerned' that they are all talking behind his back, like pussies.

The man, who spoke to a colleague on condition of anonymity, is aware of a 'certain something in the air' which smacks of something slightly sinister, rather unbecoming, quite unnecessary, and wholly pathetic.

According to the man, this feeling of unease and suspicion first crept upon him some time ago, when he read comments about his quite innocent activities on an internet website, which led to him thinking that things other people had written might have been about him, but this was not immediately clear, due to their superior wit.

This 'feeling' was confirmed by the colleague.

Speaking to me in a dark recess, the paranoid man said:

"It's just something 'I feel' - instinct, or whatever. My ears are constantly burning, but this is not unpleasant. They're flogging a dead horse, and, like me mam used to say, whilst they're tittle-tattling away behind your own back, they're leaving some other poor bugger alone."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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