Written by rs zemog

Tuesday, 6 June 2006

image for Iraq or 666? Responsible for the Demise of the IC.
ICA's leading researcher, Saddam bin Hussein at-Takriti, seeing here at his research lab, is sure as shooting that the American devils are to blam

The International Crab has been disappearing, but why? Have the International Crab been affected by the Iraq war? or is there some truth to the claim of leading scientists, albeit religious, that the significance of the number 666 has something to do with it?

The International Crab Association, ICA, one of the original researchers in the field of near-death studies, have published the latest report on the state of the International Crab, a marine crustacean predominantly found around the west coast of Iraq near the border with Jordan and Syria.

ICA's latest report, primarily based on a phenomenon that occurs only twice within a century in an odd cycle of 40 and 60 years - 666 crabs surface in unison at precisely 6:06:06 on June 6 of the years 6 and 66 - indicated a remarkably low number of crabs caught by the Iraquian Navy since the tumbled of Saddam. ICA's scientist are concerned that the war's aerial bombing of the near port of Baghdad have caused the crustacean to retreat to deeper areas of the Iraquian sea and thus jeopardizing the unusual occurrence; only once, in modern history, has that happened, 2000 years ago after a man was crucified for our sins.

All eyes will be on ICA on June 6, 2006 in the 12 hour period starting at 6:06:06 am and ending at 6:06:06 pm. World Championship Sports Network (WCSN), channel 666 on your local cable, devoted to televising premier international sports competitions from around the world, will deliver exclusive coverage of the event by offering U.S. viewers same-day live and delayed coverage of the 2006 International Crab migration online beginning June 6 at 6:06 p.m. (EDT) from Iraq, Middle East. Invitations to participate as commentaries have been extended to leading religion scientists. Messieurs Oral Roberts, Pat Robertson, Dr. Robert H. Schuller, and your local rabbi, have accepted. The pope declined the invitations because of previous commitments.

I say, lets wait for the results before we head to Red Lobster. Mr. Robertson has warned his flock that consuming any International Crab is inviting the Devil to reside on your soul.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Topics: Iraq, Iraq War

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
54 readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more