Pregnant Alicia Keys Falls Onstage. "I didn't think a girl could get me pregnant, allegedly."

Funny story written by anthonyrosania

Wednesday, 7 July 2010

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Oh, God. Yes, oh yes. Oh, Colonel Dr. Margarether Cammermeyer, YES!!!

A very pregnant Alicia Keys, who continues to tour even though she looks like Rush Limbaugh with a hair weave, fell on her fat ass while performing at the I Had A Hit Once Music Festival on Saturday night.

Keys was in the middle of 'Love Is Blind' a single no one will ever hear, when she stumbled backward and fell. She jumped up and continued to sing, even as her entire back-up band laughed at her.

What is strangest, however, is that Keys had no idea she was pregnant.

"I didn't think the kind of sex I have can result in pregnancy," the pop singer said. "I talked to Oprah, Queen Latifah and Jodie Foster, and they assured me it wasn't possible."

Keys wouldn't identify just what kind of sex she was talking about, but the Missy Elliott CD she was listening to spoke volumes.

"I feel terrible. I mean, its not like Michelle Rodriguez and I will stop vacationing together in Borneo, but I am shocked.

Allegedly, allegedly.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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