US District Judge Richard Matsch, the no nonsense federal judge who presided over the Oklahoma City bombing trials of Timothy McVeigh and Terry Nichols, will be hearing the civil suit filed against Kobe Bryant by the woman involved in the sexual harassment suit.
In Eagle County Colorado, a certain judge who shall remain nameless, has put a gagging order on "anything that moves" for the criminal trial. Here, as a result of the judge standing too close to a recreation of the Oklahoma bombing scene, everyone will be required to shout for the duration of the trial.
Judge Matsch was allocated the Kobe Bryant civil trial through the Random-Assignment-System used in Denver Federal Court.
In practice how this works is that the Chief Justice looks at his court roll and tips off the judges he likes. They immediately invoke Section 92 (1)(a)(1) of the Judges Act which states :
"Notwithstanding anything to the contrary contained herein, in statute, precedent or in the common law, a judge who is aware that a controversial suit dealing with a sporting superstar is on the roll, shall forthwith book into a hotel in Tijuana until the suit has been allocated a judge."
This doesn't help His Honour because he can't hear much because of the Oklahoma trial. Everytime the Chief tries to warn him he smiles back and almost gets killed by judges stampeding past on the way to Mexico.
One can only picture the scene of deathly quiet in the criminal trial : The witness whispering answers, His Honour going "Huh?!!!", His Eddyship The Eagle telling orderly's to cite "that genius for contempt". The producers from court TV gagging their side orders of Pastrami.
Kobe Bryant will also have to learn two cultures. The court in Eagle versus the Court in Denver. It will make the rest of his career seem like a cakewalk. Eagle where he won't be able to cough without the old darling on the bench having an apoplexy and then onto Denver where everytime his stomach rumbles ..."HuH?!!!"
The Miami Herald says that Matsch was called upon to set out a school bussing system for Denver in a desegregation case. I'll bet that Eagle comes off any timetable His Honour set up once he's had a chance to pop past the criminal case.
