Candy Corn Fans Competeing with Candy Ethanol Producers

Funny story written by Adam Click

Sunday, 1 November 2009

image for Candy Corn Fans Competeing with Candy Ethanol Producers
Production has set record levels as candy corn farmers step up to meet increased demand from candy ethanol producers.

Worries of a candy corn shortage are gripping the nation as fans of the Halloween staple compete with alternative energy producers for the scrumptious commodity.

Candy ethanol producers have been using more and more candy corn during the past three years, as the price difference between candy ethanol and candy gasoline widens. This makes candy ethanol a more attractive fuel for children's pedal cars, despite claims of lower mileage when using the alternative fuel.

The candy ethanol boom has been a boon for candy corn farmers as well, who have lobbied the federal government for years to get subsidies for the production of candy ethanol. Production of candy corn has thus far been able to keep up with increased demand, but critics of using candy corn for fuel worry about how long that trend can continue.

They also worry about the ethics of using a candy for fuel when there are so many children begging for candy in the streets. Parents also argue that children don't run as well on candy ethanol as they do on candy gasoline. They worry that the fuel may also harm their children's digestive systems, making them "go" more often.

The candy ethanol producers dismiss all these concerns saying that candy ethanol is an inexpensive, reliable source of renewable energy, which is good for children and the environment. They also say that using candy corn to make candy ethanol does not endanger the nation's candy corn supply in any way.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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