Rome, Italy/ Bloody Ass Religious Mess - The world's religious leaders are humming today with the news that President Obama, amongst others of his anointed minions, won't be granted Saint Hood by the Pope.
The President's Religious Czar, Reverend Wright, had traveled personally to the Vatican to lay out Obama's claims, bringing with him 150 white coated medical doctors to verify the periodical rectal bleeding syndrome that plagues the president, his rectally challenged House Banking Chairman, and the hemorrhaging San Francisco bleeding liberal, Pelosi.
Wright laid out a carefully scripted case, complete with photos taken at Walter Reed Army Hospital, where the trio receive complete dental and rectal care at tax payers expense, euphemistically called the "Public Option for Elected Officials."
Emerging from the council chambers where the request was denied, Rev. Wright was up beat, " Well, WTF, one out of 3 ain't bad...we still got the Nobel, and a .333 batting average keeps you in the ACORN lineup against all this white right handed pitchin."
First Lady Michelle Obama, who has since stopped bleeding and has just simply 'scabbed over' was said to be 'Bull Shit!'
"Can't never trust those ole Queens....why, Barry even voted for the old Nazi at the last Papal Election, and this is how he pays us back! He's got a lot to learn about community organizing...just wait till 450M Black African Catholics show up at the Vatican boycotting Olive Oil!"
A fact checking source at CNN said that Michelle's claim of Barry voting for the Pope was not quite accurate. While physically there during the final vote, he voted "President", and not "Go, Dawg!"
