Dallarse, Texas - (Vas Deference): "He looks sorta familiar in a ghoulish, asshole kinda way," Highlands Lake resident Mrs Fanny Redneck said today.
"That tattoo on his scrotum. Is it some sort of sorority barcode?"
Other residents whose backyards have been sullied with a visitation from the masked, naked mystery flasher reckon it's a Yale University Skull And Bones Club serial number 'POTUS 666-9/11'.
The grey-haired, paunchy, overweight perv always wears a Dick Cheney skiing mask.
Last week he was caught on CCTV climbing over a garden fence, whirling dervishly on Mrs Harlot's lawn before diving stark naked into the Crackenfurters' pool.
Police dogs even chased the psychotic flasher as he urinated into an air conditioning unit and then danced on top.
"Some retired folks round here get mighty testy waiting for their goddam Presidential Library & Museum to get goin'" Officer Bauckhaus commented.
