WACKY TABACKY, Alabama - (Satire News) - The QuinniPinni Polling Agency (Research Division) has just discovered a 27-year-old woman living in Alabama, who claims to be the illegitimate daughter of Donald Trump.
The woman, who works as a fry cook at the town's lone McDonalds is named Ivinia Trump.
Ivinia said that she has dozens of photos of her mother and Mr. Trump in various degrees of flagrante sexatosis.
Ivy, as her volleyball coach calls her, said that her mother Maureen Mittasucki, used to tell her about her "Daddy Don," and how tall, handsome, and orange he was.
Mo said that when Ivinia turned 12, Trump bought her a shetland pony, which she named "Stormy" way before Stormy Daniels came into the picture.
SIDENOTE: When told about his alleged "New-Found" daughter, DJT replied that he has never been to Alabama, or the south, and he certainly does not recall boinking Maureen Mittasucki.
