Los Angeles, California - Aviation search parties would be better off scouring the Malaysian runway a clairvoyant Los Angeles shaman said today accusing airport authorities of using a cloak 'n' dagger cloaking device and other high tech stuff.
Pomona Hexoplasm, 69, has alerted NORAD, the US Coast Guard and NCIS HQ Special Agent Jethro Gibbs about the theory including results of a Ouija board message pointing the finger at an elaborate hoax.
"The missing plane is still somewhere near the airport's original departure lounge," Pomona's blog relates, "swathed in an electronic force field that repels all contact while complex ransom negotiations takes place."
Commenting on the psychic's message a Malaysian airport janitor said tonight the Boeing 777's on board toilets would now be full to bursting if Ms Hexoplasm's theories are correct.
