Written by queen mudder

Friday, 23 August 2013

image for Chelsea ducks family vacation with Uncle Roger Clinton and Uncle Tony Rodham
Clinton clan dog walkers patroling East Hampton beach

Sagaponack, Long Island - Pleading a sudden urgent desire to finish her doctoral dissertation on US roil families' White House careers Chelsea Clinton has fled to Oxford, England to beaver away the tail-end of the summer at the famous Bodleian Library.

A last minute 'dear Mom & Pop' email went down 'like a lead balloon' as Bill and Hillary waited to board their chopper for the half-hour Hamptons flight where they're holidaying at a rented $11 million Sagaponack beachside mansion.

Guests at the palatial eight-bed spread are said to include the President's 'black sheep' half-brother Roger Clinton and his son Tyler, whose law-dodging antics were once described by the US media as likely to bring Bill's presidency into disrepute. (As if!]

Also slumming it at the $75,000-a-week pile is Hillary's brother Tony Rodham and son Zach from his first marriage, plus two younger half siblings Simon and Fiona.

Then there's the three Clinton pooches, eight year-old Choc Lab Seamus, a French Poodle called Tally plus newcomer pup Maisie May.

They're playing host to Roger Clinton's two Bull Mastiffs, Rahm and Humma, which are joining the extended Clinton canine clan for a few days.

Tony Rodham has arrived with his own muttley crew of pedigree bow-wows including Zach's pet Bearded Alaskan Moosehound Trigg.

Simon and Fiona Rodham's pair of Irish Wolfhounds Blarney and Collins completes the holiday tableau, give or take a small army of dog walkers, groomers, canine psychologists, veterinary practitioners and nutrition advisers.

"It's a dog's life with the Clintons," an East Hampton pool man commented, "no wonder Chelsea's pissed and has legged it to Blighty."

Husband Marc Mezvinsky is 69.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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