Our Man Awarded Medal of Honor for Virtual Heroism

Funny story written by Mitchell Kramer

Sunday, 12 February 2012

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Medal of honor to be awarded to Radington on friday

SAN DEIGO, CA -This Friday, a local resident will be awarded the countries highest honor for his valiant show of heroism and courage in Bakaara last Monday.

Seventeen year old Connor Radington repeatedly avenged and rescued several of his teammates while racking up a score of 42-1 in the Bakaara map of the viral hit video game Call Of Duty: Modern Warfare 3.

One anonymous player he rescued tells his tale, "I was crouched in the westernmost building on the map when out of nowhere a bloodthirsty opponent on the hunt for an easy kill turned a corner and mercilessly opened fire on my location. I was at the end of my clip and needed to reload quickly, but unfortunately I couldn't. At the exact moment I fired my last round, Connor, or ConRadDog85, appeared in the background behind my awaiting executor and ended his spray of fire with a well placed shotgun round.

But this wasn't the only time. He saved me a total of 16 times from situations very similar to this. I honestly don't know what I would do without him," at this point, the rescued gamer becomes greatly emotional from Connors show of valor, "I have a wife and kids, I couldn't imagine what they would go through if I lost a life like that." His undying gratitude was mirrored by the other 5 members of his squad and the millions of gamers he plays with online.

Connor will be greeted by President Obama at 4:00pm in Washington DC to receive the Medal of Honor. This ceremony will mark the first time such an award will be given for heroic actions in a non-physical war scenario.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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