The Question That Mitt Romney Went Positively Ballistic Over

Written by Abel Rodriguez

Monday, 17 October 2011

image for The Question That Mitt Romney Went Positively Ballistic Over
A picture of a cat named 'Mushroom" that Mitt Romney gave to the pizza mogul Herman Cain.

DEVIL'S LAKE, North Dakota - Mitt Romney's The Mormon Master Bus Tour pulled into Devil's Lake where Romney met with about 17 supporters at The Lips of The Dastardly Dragon Chinese Restaurant.

Romney, bought egg rolls and orders of Crab Rangoon for all 17 individuals who ranged in age from three months to 103-years-old.

According to Vodka Vermicelli of iRumors Romney was busy talking to the assembled crowd about the Texas Rangers defeating the Detroit Tigers and the San Francisco 49ers defeating the Detroit Lions, and the fact that the city of Detroit has more unemployed carburetor makers than any city in America.

Someone suddenly asked him just what the hell he had against Detroit. Romney pointed at the man and said that he had nothing against Detroit and why did he ask.

The man replied, "Well first of all bro, puts down da damn egg roll, didn't jur mama eva tells ya not ta point witcha food?

Romney apologized and asked for the man's name.

"Nunna." Came the reply.

"Nunna?" Asked a puzzled Romney.

"Yeah - Dat be right. Nunna jur damn bitness dat be what my name not be."

Romney asked the man if he had a legitimate question or if he was just going to stand around acting like a black version of Gary Busey?

The man shot back, "Say Skippy, doncha be talkin 'bout me being an illgitmut baby and all cause I knows fo a fact dat my daddy and my mama was married and I don't know if I can say da same thang bout you, ya know, account you being one of dem Utah Morsels and all."

[EDITOR'S NOTE: I'm pretty sure that 'Nunna' meant to say Mormons instead of Morsels.]

Romney was so disgusted that he did not realize that he had run his fingers through his hair while holding an egg roll.

Nunna started laughing and asked him if he was using Alberto Culver.

"Okay, fella!" An angry Romney shouted. "Now that's it. I have been more than patient with you but now you have gone to far by asking if I used Alberto Culver."

Romney went positively ballistic as he yelled out, "You sir have really got my Mormon dander up. I'll have you know that I have never used Alberto Culver or any other illegal alien in my entire political career."

Nunna started laughing so hard he spilled his quart of Ripple Wine all over his order of Crab Rangoon.

The restaurant owner walked over to Nunna and asked him to please leave because he did not want for a highly animated Mitt Romney to scare off anymore of his customers.

October 22, is National Mother-In-Law Day, except in California where it was eliminated back in 1973, to avoid all of the confusion due to so many multiple marriages.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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