Written by Inhopeless

Saturday, 27 November 2010

(written by Inhopeless's friend, James Smith)

BIRMINGHAM - A coalition of several companies, people, and political parties will sue spoofer Inhopeless for defamation.

Inhopeless, whose name has been disguised to protect his identity, and also because that's the name he uses on the site, will be taken to the City of Birmingham Magistrates' Court to be tried for 'libel and defamation of character' for posting nearly 90 posts on TheSpoof.com, concerning the accusers.

"We have every right to nab him," said a Sony spokesman, "because of him, sales of our new Walkman range went down during 2008!" However, Inhopeless started posting on November the 5th 2010.

Inhopeless said this: "Ah well," he sighed. "All great artists suffer for their art. Van Gogh, etc. If they extradite me to America, which they most likely will, and execute me, then mayby I'll get more 5-thumbs for my stories! After all, Michael Jackson brought in over $200 million AFTER his death."

The Tea Party and Palin are also there to sue him.

"He wrote about people suing us for false advertising," said a Tea Party member, "We'll look who's getting sued now! We've got our best lawyer, Ol' Bob Hick, he's the smartest guy in our party. He is such a cute puppy too."

"When I become President in 2012," said Palin, "I'll make sure jackasses like him in the lamestream media never make fun of me again!" The crowd then booed and threw shit at her.

A huge crowd assembled outside the courts on the day of the trial, many waving placards.

"You know, this is ridiculous," said one protester. "Freedom of Speech, innit? I mean, this is a great change from protesting about the government, but this... it's not doing their image any favours."

Financial experts in Inhopeless's home have suggested that he would have to pay nearly £2,000,000 ($3,200,000).

"Yeah," said his little brother, 11, "We're doing the Law in PSHE, and this'll be my case study. But seriously? £2mn? He can't lend me ten pence, let alone that much."

As of press time, a secret tunneling operation to dig Inhopeless out has gone underway - literally.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: lawsuits

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